A night in

Feels so strange – a Saturday night, and I'm at home.

Turned down offer to go to the Blue Bar in Porthtowan to see Rosie and the Goldbug. No doubt would've been fun, but a combination of feeling dog-tired, being potentially crap company, and not wanting to abandoned Billy and Lucy home alone for the evening, meant that I uncharacteristically said 'No'. Was also thinking that I might drive over to the party in Helston later – so saving my energy/staying sober for that, but now, I just can't be asked. Is it really worth the effort to traipse over to a hardcore shindig, knowing that I have to stay straight; knowing that I'd have to leave at a relatively sensible time (3am-ish); and knowing that I probably wouldn't know anyone else there other than the 3 Daft Monkey lot. Do I really want to give Jeff the impression that I'm keen? And do I really want to have another night of no sleep given that I've got all this friggin work to do?

Was just getting ready for bed last night when Eddie came in playing good Samaritan – bringing home a mate of his who'd been involved in a nasty domestic back at his house. He'd got in a fight with his dad's drunken friend and had ended up in casualty with a broken hand. His mum, who's a nurse was on duty at A&E at the time, but it was our Paul, the bass player, who attended to him.

Anyway, Eddie very kindly offered him a bed here for the night, so by the time we'd sorted out sleeping bags etc, made hot sweet tea, and I'd heard the full and detailed blow by blow account, it was getting on for 3.30am. No wonder I'm tired! That and modelling first thing this morning and surfing this afternoon.

Had my arm twisted to take everyone down to Gwenver (except Lucy, who was at an extra gym session to prep for tomorrow's gymnastics competition). Didn't have to twist too far as a gloriously sunny day, even if the wind was a tad harsh. Resisted getting in when actually there though as kitting up in a wetsuit etc.. is always such an effort. Only took two boards, so Rosie and Billy went in to begin with, leaving me to quite happily get stuck into some more of Into Thin Air. Rosie came out in a right grump – in tears because she thinks she can't surf any more. Really difficult to try and console her because she won't accept any praise or encouragement – insisting that she's just crap. Hate seeing her so upset, especially as it's all totally unwarranted.

Bit the bullet and hit the water – first time since early January I think. The sea was way warmer than I'd expected, and after a somewhat nervous start, I ended up having a wicked surf. Caught loads more waves than I usually do, and because it was all sunshine, blue skies and fabulous ocean all round – really, really enjoyed it. Found myself grinning inanely – even burst out laughing for no particular reason. Just the tonic I needed as it gave my spirits a real lift (even if only temporarily) how could you not love life and feel positive under the circumstances?

Don't half ache from all the paddling out now though, and can't understand why it seems to use completely different muscles in your arms, compared to regular swimming in a pool? Or maybe my exertions yesterday just compounded the stiffness and soreness today.

Nodding off as I type here. Definitely going to have to give the party a miss. It's official. I'm turning into a miserable, boring old git. I'd never have turned down a party invite before. Never, ever, ever! And now I'm a proverbial lightweight. I'm annoyed with myself now, but simply don't have the physical reserves to do anything other than collapse into bed. Right now.