I love you Daisy!

Overwhelmed by my lovely, amazing friend's thoughtfulness and kindness. Had literally just been moaning at car-share Sarah that I was starving, but dreading having to cook dinner when I got home (part lack of inspiration, part exhaustion, and part fed-upness that there's never anyone else to do it) when lo and behold, the fist thing I saw when I walked into the kitchen were two catering-size foil take-away containers, brimful of piping hot, delicious, veggie Shepard's pie. Bloody marvellous. Exactly what I needed, and so I piled masses of it onto a plate, scoffing it then and there. Didn't even sit down, which is terribly bad-mannered of me (allegedly bad for the digestion as well) but I was so excited by this gifted meal, my enthusiasm got the better of me. I am so touched by her neighbourly gesture – that's the kind of thing that keeps me here in Penzance. My wonderful, generous, gorgeous, talented, fun, creative. Fantastic friends. Yes I love you Daisy, and all the rest of you out there (you know who you are). Too many to thank, but I do, thank you.

Gosh, that was a tad emotional. Kind of ran away with it there for a minute, but can't waffle on cos I've got to head off to band practice imminently. Hopefully the freebay car won't be a problem to drive out (am slightly nervous about it, it has to be said, although not quite sure why – expect it's a fine little car). Meant to empty the left-over junk and tat in it, but have run out of time now, and didn't really fancy doing it in the cold, rainy dark. Another time, soon. I'll have to go out to Graham's to organise shifting/scrapping the Fiesta anyway, so I'll be able to do it then.

Feeling incredibly brain-dead at the mo – long day at college, yet again. Spent the morning trying to complete the New Book document thingy for Susannah – wasted an incredible amount of time on the net, trying to track down stats and figures for the potential market for my book idea. Couldn't pin down anything concrete – couldn't even find the exact numbers of women in the UK aged between 25-30? Maddening. Ducked into the campus cinema at lunchtime to see a documentary about alcoholics, made by this bloke who's guest lecturing at the Uni tomorrow night. Pretty harrowing stuff, and a graphic and timely reminder of what lies ahead for Terry in the next few years (i.e. chronic liver disease, pain and debilitating health complications, and probably, a very ugly, premature death). Here I am, sorting out drawing up a will because I'm worried about what will happen to the kids if I die, and they end up in Terry's care, when actually, he's seriously not long for this world. A sobering thought (pun not really intended).

This afternoon's class was preparation for the MA. Helen, the woman taking us through this stage of the game is great – very thorough, professional, and clearly knows her stuff, so that's encouraging. But at the same time, it's awfully frightening finding out the depth, and quantity of work that's expected from us, in what seems a ridiculously short period of time. Panic, panic. Here I was trying to talk myself into completing the unit this year, by somehow handing it in 3weeks early (get it out of the way so that I can get on with life/enjoy the summer with the kids without this thing hanging over my head) but now that looks like mission impossible. She did seem genuinely interested in my book idea though, so at least I can be confident that that's a goer. Tricky bit is where to start – how to structure it, what angle to take, and which bits go in! Doesn't help that I'm so crap at making decisions.

Drove back via Constantine because Sarah needed to have a look at the caravan that Cathy's giving away to her. A real sweety it is, and parked up on the most amazing riverside piece of land. So I said to Sarah, that when her and John leave Cornwall to move up to the house her folks are buying for them in Widdeness, she has to give me first right of refusal on it! Not that I'd have anywhere to park up a caravan other than Graham's?!

Must skedaddle. Already late for band and they'll only get teasy with me. Followed Frea's advice though to check out Lulu.com and the Blooker prize thing they run. Fascinating to read that they offer a relatively cheap 'self' publishing service. Something to consider in the future when my book's been written, and is ready to be out there.... as if.